Chase What Your Heart Desires

The Doctor's office called, and my labs came back normal.  No kidney damage.  this was weighing more heavily on me than I thought.

I am making a larger effort at walking.  I know it has to be done.  I don't want to have a stroke or a bypass before I am 40.  Is my heart that bad?  I don't know.  But why risk it?

I have been doing some fun virtual runs.  It is keeping me interested.  You log your miles and you get updates on where you are on a virtual course.  Its like $20-$25 per "race"  bt if it gets me moving, its money well spent.  I would like to participate in the QCM weekend in some capacity in September.  I don't think I will be HM ready by then so I am shooting for the 5K or the Marathon Relay if I can find some people to do it with me. Its only 3.5 months away, so I don't know if that is a realistic goal or not.  The marathon, not the 5K.  I know I can do that.  I think maybe my goal should be to walk it in under an hour?  We will see how the next 3 months go.  I want to race again.  I miss it so much.

I get so frustrated because I keep taunting myself with memories of the past.  Memories of that girl I used to be.  That girl who didn't appreciate what she was doing while she was doing it.  Some where along the way I ha forgotten where I had started, where I gone, and how I had gotten there.   Forgetting those things...I lost focus.  I let the circumstances surrounding dictate my reactions.  And when my emotional state is dictating m y actions, I get into trouble.

BUT focusing on the positive, I am ACTUALLY starting to do something about it.  I am not walking every single day, but more than I was. Small steps.  Creating a habit. A routine.  I have increased my water consumption. Those are my two big habits: Move More and Drink more water.  I feel like it is a good place to start.  I have the water thing down, so I added "cook more meals."  One, I am sick and tired of eating out.  I am bored with the options. Can't get bored with cooking because there is always a new recipe to try.  I have HUNDREDS pinned on Pinterest.  And I have like 10 cookbooks with recipes that are both favorites, and yet to be discovered.  I want to pick one new recipe each week.  Maybe two, but I am starting with one.

I know what I want now.  I know what I need to do to get there.  I want to run.  I want to wake up early on Saturdays (or Sundays) and run for a medal and a tee shirt.  I want to be the person that I took for granted 5 years ago.  

Until next time, Press On and Make Strides